Sleepless in Kirksville

Don't you hate those nights, when you're so exhausted that you lie in bed for hours, unable to sleep? I decided to visit my much-neglected blog this night, as I waited for sleep to come. As I was looking through old posts, I thought I would read through some of the ones that I had labeled as "devotions." I was rather ashamed to see only one that has been written in this year 2010 . . . and that I could count on my hand the ones I have posted since coming to school last fall.

It's funny - I can't quite imagine why I haven't posted any devotional thoughts lately. God sure hasn't gone anywhere - He's still a pretty permanent fixture in my life. In fact, this past month or so has been one of clinging to Him with every once of strength I have. I suppose my times with God and the lessons He's been teaching me are just more personal than I'd care to share on a blog. And that's okay. Hopefully someday, I can go back and share some of what has been going on lately. But for now, I have something that just came to my attention. :)

One of the old posts I read was about Holy Week, and the great Romance of our Savior. Holy Week this year has begun and I hardly realized it! You know, every year when we get to this point, the story is just the same, isn't it? We read the various Gospel's accounts of Jesus' last days, and I think it's pretty tempting to just skim over it, and say "Yeah, yeah, it's all the same information as last year."

But that's the thing - it isn't the same, at least not for those of us who are intimately acquainted with the Author of this story! Because for us, it's also our story. And every year, our lives are at least a somewhat different place than where they were last year, as is our relationship with our Lord. Last year for me, what stood out was the great Love that He showed in His death - I needed that reminder and assurance of His great Love for me.

This year, I'm looking for Hope as I read through. The Hope that after death comes life. Weeping and sorrow may last for the night, but joy comes in the morning. Some days, it's hard to believe that. But as I read the story of my Savior, I see it, plain and clear. Oh Lord - I praise you for your story. And I praise you that, through everything I've faced these past few months, it remains the same. The Hope you offer is still there, and I cling to that.

"Then the disciples went back to their homes, but Mary stood outside the tomb crying. As she wept, she bent over to look into the tomb and saw two angels in white, seated where Jesus' body had been, one at the head and the other at the foot.

They asked her, 'Woman, why are you crying?'

'They have taken my Lord away,' she said, 'and I don't know where they have put him.' At this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not realize that it was Jesus.

'Woman,' he said, 'why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?'

Thinking he was the gardener, she said, 'Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him.'

Jesus said to her, 'Mary.'

She turned toward him and cried out in Aramaic, 'Rabboni!' (which means Teacher).

Jesus said, 'Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet returned to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, "I am returning to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God." ' "

John 20:10-18

What does the story of Holy Week say to you this year?